Face Your Fears and Birth That Baby!

Anybody can tell you that there is nothing more difficult than birthing a baby. It begins with pure joy: it's all you can talk about, you're excited to tell everyone you know and you evoke your planning skills like nobody's business. What will the baby look like? What color will the room be? How will I contain this untethered love for the rest of my life?

Then the reality sets in. Your emotions are out of control; one day you're so happy you can't think of anything else, the next you're crying on the bathroom floor and you're not even really sure what you're crying about. It's months of sleepless, uncomfortable nights. And then you wonder if you're even cut out for this job.

Finally the baby is born and you experience love on a level you've never known! Then you're exhausted from the months of more sleepless nights. You find yourself again crying on the bathroom floor and wondering "What the hell was I thinking? Of course I'm not cut out for this job!"

Oh, did you think I was talking about a child? I'm sorry, this is about starting a business! Yes, I have a beautiful baby - a wonderful girl's store filled with beautiful things and visited by beautiful girls with their beautiful moms, aunties and grandmoms. But every now and then (more like once a week), I'm on the bathroom floor, crying hysterically, saying to myself "What the hell were you thinking? You are definitely NOT cut out for this job!"

But then, something good happens - it always does. Like that time I was simply paying a comment to a complete stranger on how fab she looked and it turned into an opportunity to dress actress Drew Sidora's baby because - of course - that fabulously dressed chica is stylist Stacey Lynn of Her Treasures Boutique. Or my husband's chance meeting of customers Shalonda and Kamal Woods of R.O.K. Island Clothing and striking up a conversation (as he does with EVERY ONE HE MEETS) and then they drop by not only to shop but to offer up advice and assistance on how to make my store great because - of course - he's a visual merchandiser and store owner himself.

And then there's the community support like folks who just drop by to say "Thank you for coming to the neighborhood; we're happy you're here!" Or the journalist who brings her daughter to the book reading and then leaves and writes this: article:

This post is not to brag on how fabulous, or smart or dynamic I am, but just the opposite: how scared and unsure and totally unprepared for a venture such as this. But that didn't and won't stop me from doing it anyway. 

All great businesses started with an idea - much like the one you're obsessing over right now - and with a lot of hard work, some sleepless nights and the sheer willing this thing to grow, it turns into something great! So this is your motivational pep talk: if I can collect myself up off the bathroom floor and fight through the fear then, by all means, get your ass up, take a deep breath and push that baby out! That baby won't birth itself!

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